Like many women, I find myself often tired and weary. I work two jobs, I am an active member of an amazing sorority (Sigma Omicron Epsilon), I am active in church, and I have been trying to find a harmonious balance between eating right and exercising. Plus, I maintain an active social life. I often wonder how I can accomplish everything that I want because the aforementioned does not reflect the plethora of other goals and ambitions that I have. I always aim to be a woman who handles her own, but what happens when life starts to weigh you down? My mother says if you don’t sit down, your body will make you sit down! In this article, I will discuss ways to make sure that you are focused on being well-rounded, but also taking the time needed to rest so that you are not pouring from an empty cup, as my dear soror, Nicki says. There are three ways to ensure that you do not over extend yourself.
- Learn how to unapologetically say no.
- Limit your time to only the projects and people that are meaningful to you.
- Enjoy some R&R, hun. The R&B group Xscape said it best “kick off your shoes and relax your feet.”
Say no and be okay with that
Let’s be completely honest here. How often do we get suckered into doing a task that we would rather not do? Why is that? For me personally, I felt guilty telling people no. Whenever a shift needed to be worked, you could count me in. No one showed up to the event, Jasmin is there. You need help and no one else is available? Here I come flying in my car, midnight. It’s time out for that. Don’t misquote me, I will still be there for anyone because I have a heart to help people, but it will not be to the extent where I am not taking care of myself properly. Remember, if you don’t rest your body/mind/spirit properly, you are not taking care of yourself and in turn that is actually a disservice to those you want to help. In order to assist someone, you have to come from a place where you are putting your best self forward and not an exhausted and cranky version of you. I have been there and done that.
Quality over Quantity
I have learned over the years that it is best to put your all into a few quality projects versus trying to tackle the world. For one thing, doing too many things at once is not good because it becomes overwhelming. While many people are self-proclaimed multi-taskers, how much attention can really be paid to each assignment while you’re doing multiple things? If you are not 100% focused on one project at a time then one of your endeavors will surely fail. I remember when I was in high school, I used to wonder how some of my classmates were involved in so many clubs, activities and sports. Until one day in my senior year, I overheard a conversation where a young lady told her friend that she was the president of one organization but hadn’t attended a meeting in a month. This opened my eyes because I realized that everything is not what it seems and that my original statement stands. It is not realistic to take on a heavy load of activities just to be busy. My mother told me that you can do anything you want in life but you cannot do everything. That being said, I try to live by that motto.
During my senior year of high school, I put my efforts into a small organization called the Family Career Community Leaders of America (FCCLA) and tutoring. In college, I worked a few part-time jobs, volunteered when I could and participated in a health administration organization. By the time I graduated, I had found my way and had joined my sorority which allowed me to pursue my passion of raising awareness for Native and minority women, community service and education. I say all of this to say that I thrived in each of these areas but only because I would give my all to a select one or two projects at a time. Even wonder woman knew her limits and you should too.
“Kick of your shoes and relax your feet.”
Rest is fundamental to your body. If you’re a believer, then you know that in the bible God even took his rest on the sabbath day. If you’re not a believer and this bears no significance, you still need to take time to relax. 🙂
Many people are running around on “E” and it is obvious because the exhaustion is written all over their face. As women, we are the backbone of our homes and are relied on to be there for everyone else. However, who is going to be there for you? I commend every woman to advocate for themselves and take time for you. Schedule blocks of time for rest if you insist that there is never enough time in the day. You cannot care for everyone else while neglecting yourself. Challenge yourself this week to evaluate your schedule and determine when you can take a breather and relax. You will not regret it. Until next time!
Jasmin Ikard resides in Greenville, NC.
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